It’s hard to be high. A deep sigh with a mixed set of emotions filled my chest as I inhaled my last puff of smoke. Seconds later, I crushed my cigarette and looked at the pack where it’s from.

Vogue. A fancy name. Hard to believe that it sounds as posh as that magazine cover women usually purchase on their way to work. Then again, it’s the word that best expresses society today where the prim and the proper rush out to get the latest accessories and trends available in the market.  People nowadays die to grab anything that makes them suit themselves in the eyes of the ever evolving society. It disgusts me till my very guts and last breath I took from that stick that I had purchased a week ago.

What a hypocrite. I should be a disappoint to myself at this very moment. Then again, my consciousness is begging me to reconsider and deal with the realism people believe to be life, as norms set in are invincibly made for everyone abide to.

This whole thing that I just did used to be my daily routine when I first attempted to grasp what’s said to be the very core of Italian culture — by first drinking some Italian made coffee without any form of doubt, then smoking some cigarette one fancied.  You’ve always got to trust Italian brewed coffee they said. And so I did.  As for the cigarettes, it’s all in the mind. One gets to decide to stick to it, or not as chewing gums decide to fall off from the wall or tables by itself or not.

Sooner or later, I unconsciously do all of that just for the heck of it. I became numb as how normal people seem to have become. I guess there’s this switch in our brains that turns us to zombies ready for productivity as economists and politicians call it.  We can always choose to question everything, most especially what it means to be human. But by permitting ourselves to be mainstream and validate the norms of today, do we actually stop and re-evaluate every deed we’ve done be it for ourselves or for others?

Then again I asked myself, how hard was it to get high after all this commotion? I guess that I was too numb to ever feel it to begin with.


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